7.04.2013

narrative

"killer" whales were so designated after brandon flowers and company officially named them nevada's state fish. 'those are some killer whales' flowers is rumored to have mumbled after watching six of the creatures devour 180 pounds of carp strategically laced with the fading memory of david byrne. he then turned to his drummer, who had just returned from a suspiciously long trip to the restroom to snort cocaine: 'the 80's is dead, man. i got rid of the evidence.'

an well-dressed group of homicidal maniacs.
the killer "whale" is not a whale at all, but actually belongs to the mollusk family, and is more closely related to the common bumblebee than any other creature still living. both species evolved from the same common ancestor, pop sensation david bowie. but the buck was never intended to stop here, folks, because evolution would never have happened if it weren't first discovered and painstakingly recorded by the 19th-century biologist and circle of life enthusiast phil collins.

a young bowie gives thanks to charles darwin for
discovering space travel. (circa 83780 bc)
to wrap things up, ladies and gents, all is not entirely what it seems. so you best keep calm and carry on, just as our ancestors in the animal kingdom have done for decades. we can all rest assured that we'll be fed and fed well, provided our zoo-keeper is not brandon flowers. buzz on bumblefish. buzz on through the night!


don't do it, man. he's just using you for your fatty tissue.

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